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Booty Call Agreement copy and paste it funny stuff 10.8.2008
Booty Call Agreement
This pre-booty call agreement (here in after referred
to as the "Agreement") is entered into on the
_____________ day of ___________, 2008 by_______________
and ________________.
THIS AGREEMENT SHALL COVER THE FOLLOWING RULE AND PRINCIPALS:
1. No sleeping over. Unless it is very good and we need to
repeat it in the morning.
2. No meeting ...
4 Kommentare, 129 Angesehen,
8 Stimmen
,5.33 Gesamtpunktzahl
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40 MISTAKES MEN MAKE WHILE HAVING SEX WITH WOMEN 9.8.2008
I posted this under My other nic on TransenFlirt.com, Transen Kontakte, Shemale Kontakte, Transen Treff I just had to bring
it over here to Xmatch.
This is what I was told by a woman so I guess it is true..
Guys take a little time to read ALL of this. You might
be surprised just how true it is.
1) NOT KISSING FIRST. Avoiding her lips and diving straight
for the erogenous zones makes her feel like you're ...
5 Kommentare, 209 Angesehen,
17 Stimmen
,6.52 Gesamtpunktzahl
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travelling man 30.7.2008
My wife, when I traveled away, Made sly extramarital hay, And partied for hours With chosen endowers, And often came back the next day.
1 Kommentare, 79 Angesehen,
1 Stimmen
,1.10 Gesamtpunktzahl
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newlyweds 30.7.2008
To his bride a young bridegroom said, "Pish! Your cunt is as big as a dish!" She replied, "Why, you fool, With your limp little tool It's like driving a nail with a fish!"
1 Kommentare, 71 Angesehen,
2 Stimmen
,1.04 Gesamtpunktzahl
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Age of consent - not cuumulative! 19.7.2008
Carbon here - TransenFlirt.com, Transen Kontakte, Shemale Kontakte, Transen Treff self proclaimed resident sex and relationship
advice guru.
THIS WEEK: Twins!
A warning for all you lovers out there - when on the rather
sensitive (and provocatively imaginative) subject of
twins, there are a few important, but often overlooked
issues that need to be addressed. These tips have been researched
dilligently by myself and others in my relationship ...
1 Kommentare, 128 Angesehen,
25 Stimmen
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watch what you wish for...... 3.7.2008
A man was sick and tired of going to work every day while his
wife stayed home. He wanted her to see what he went through,
so he prayed:
'Dear Lord: I go to work every day and put in 8 hours while
my wife merely stays at home. I want her to know what I go through,
so please allow her body to switch with mine for a day Amen.'
God, in his infinite wisdom, granted the man's wish.
...
5 Kommentare, 171 Angesehen,
13 Stimmen
,4.99 Gesamtpunktzahl
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The Tale of the Kiss`in Cousins 2.7.2008
Howdy,
I come from a tiny little mining town in West Virginia that
I fondly refer to as “Booger Hole”. We moved away from there
when I was around 9 years old but I briefly returned just
before my 14th birthday when my Pa-Paw fell ill.
I was still a virgin unless you count the endless hours I
spent jacking off and had never even seen a girl naked before
(I don`t ...
0 Kommentare, 226 Angesehen,
5 Stimmen
,3.14 Gesamtpunktzahl
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HOW TO MAKE WOMEN HAPPY...? 30.6.2008
How To Make Women Happy... The Point System (advice according to women)
In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the
woman happy. Do something she likes and you get points.
Do something she dislikes and points are subtracted. You
don't get any points for doing something she expects.
Sorry, that's the way the game is played.
Simple Duties: You make the bed (+1) You ...
1 Kommentare, 126 Angesehen,
17 Stimmen
,0.86 Gesamtpunktzahl
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man are like... 30.6.2008
... Blenders. You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
... Coffee. The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night
long.
... Commercials. You can't believe a word they say.
... Computers. Hard to figure out and never have enough memory.
... Coolers. Load them ...
2 Kommentare, 82 Angesehen,
21 Stimmen
,2.51 Gesamtpunktzahl
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man and woman 30.6.2008
Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before? Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.
Man: Is this seat empty? Woman: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.
Man: Your place or mine? Woman: Both. You go to yours, and I'll go to mine.
Man: So, what do you do for a living? Woman: I'm a female impersonator.
Man: Hey baby, what's your sign? Woman: Do not ...
0 Kommentare, 63 Angesehen,
12 Stimmen
,1.92 Gesamtpunktzahl
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Pitching the bull:Why every seducer is a salesman! 28.6.2008
You seea fabulous girl at a party, You approach her and
say"I'm fantastic in bed", THATS A DIRECT MARKETING
You're at a party with bunch of friends and see a fabulous
girl, You have one of your friends approach her and point
at you and say, "He's fantastic in bed", THATS DIRECT ADVERTISING
You see a fabulous girl at a party, aproach her to get her
fone number, next day you call ...
0 Kommentare, 51 Angesehen,
2 Stimmen
,2.42 Gesamtpunktzahl
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short but funny 28.6.2008
What did the alcoholic do with his first 50 cent piece? He married her ...
2 Kommentare, 75 Angesehen,
9 Stimmen
,3.64 Gesamtpunktzahl
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THE DREAMER 13.6.2008
After she woke up, a woman told her husband, "I just
dreamed that you gave me a pearl necklace for Valentine's day.
What do you think it means?"
"You'll know tonight." he said.
That evening, the man came home with a package and gave it
to his wife. Delighted, she opened it - to find a book entitled
"The meaning of dreams"
2 Kommentare, 293 Angesehen,
5 Stimmen
,2.82 Gesamtpunktzahl
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playboy centerfold 13.6.2008
Playboy is coming out with a new magazine for men who are
married.
Every month the centerfold is the exact same woman.
1 Kommentare, 71 Angesehen,
4 Stimmen
,3.25 Gesamtpunktzahl
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halloween costume 13.6.2008
On the night of a Halloween costume party a couple were having
trouble picking suitable outfits. After a while the wife
got mad and stormed out of the room. Fifteen minutes later she came
back completely naked execpt for a lemon between her legs.
The husband looked at her for a moment and then stormed out
of the room himself. Twenty minutes passed and then he came
back himself with a ...
2 Kommentare, 110 Angesehen,
3 Stimmen
,4.41 Gesamtpunktzahl
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a picture is worth a thousand words.... 13.6.2008
A wealthy man sat in his attorney's office. "Do you want the bad news first or the terrible news?"
the lawyer asked. "Give me the bad news first." "Your wife found a picture worth a half-million dollars."
"That's the bad news?" the man asked incredulously.
"I can't wait to hear the terrible news."
"It's of you and your mistress."
4 Kommentare, 138 Angesehen,
6 Stimmen
,3.65 Gesamtpunktzahl
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next??? 13.6.2008
HOW TO STOP PEOPLE FROM BUGGING YOU ABOUT GETTING MARRIED
Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the
ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next."
They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.
1 Kommentare, 103 Angesehen,
11 Stimmen
,5.04 Gesamtpunktzahl
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men and women 13.6.2008
What is the difference between men and women?
A woman wants one man to satisfy her every need. A man wants every woman to satisfy his one need.
1 Kommentare, 50 Angesehen,
3 Stimmen
,2.94 Gesamtpunktzahl
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hmmmmmm..... 13.6.2008
A guy was trying to console a friend who'd just found
his wife in bed with another man. "Get over it, buddy, " he said. "It's
not the end of the world." "It's all right for you to say, " answered
his buddy. "But what if you came home one night and caught another man in bed with
your wife?" The fella ponders for a moment, then says, "I'd
break his cane and kick his seeing-eye in the ass."
2 Kommentare, 98 Angesehen,
3 Stimmen
,3.92 Gesamtpunktzahl
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headache cure?? 13.6.2008
A husband emerged from the bathroom naked and was climbing into bed when his wife complained, as usual, "I have a headache." "Perfect" her husband said. "I was just
in the bathroom powdering my penis with aspirin. You can take it orally or as a suppository, ... it's up to you!"
2 Kommentare, 94 Angesehen,
2 Stimmen
,4.50 Gesamtpunktzahl
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tech support 13.6.2008
Dear Tech Support:
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and
noticed that the new program began making unexpected changes to the accounting
modules, limiting access to flower and jewelry applications that
had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband
1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.9 but installed
undesirable programs ...
1 Kommentare, 57 Angesehen,
0 Stimmen
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men and wine..... 13.6.2008
Men are like fine wine. They all start out like grapes, and it's a woman's job to stomp on them and keep
them in the dark until they mature into something you'd
want to have dinner with.
2 Kommentare, 195 Angesehen,
11 Stimmen
,4.29 Gesamtpunktzahl
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poor frank 13.6.2008
On his way out of church, Frank stopped at the door to speak
to the minister. "Would it be right, " he asked, "for
a person to profit from the mistakes of another?" "Absolutely not!" replied the pastor. "In that case, " said the young man, "I
wonder if you'd consider returning the hundred dollars I paid you to marry my wife
and me last July."
1 Kommentare, 67 Angesehen,
3 Stimmen
,2.94 Gesamtpunktzahl
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Q&A 3.6.2008
Q: How do you keep your husband from reading your e-mail?
A: Rename the mail folder to "instruction manuals
1 Kommentare, 53 Angesehen,
0 Stimmen
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men and women 3.6.2008
Men and women are not alike.
Sure, you thought you already knew that. But now we have
conculsive proof! After countless hours of surveys and studies on
the following topics, these facts have emerged:
RELATIONSHIPS:
First, a man does not call a relationshipo a relationship
- he refers to it as "that time when me and Suzie were boinking on
a semi-regular basis." ...
2 Kommentare, 73 Angesehen,
2 Stimmen
,3.12 Gesamtpunktzahl
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WEATHERING MARRIAGE 2.6.2008
What do Marriage and a Tornado have in common?
Well you start off with a lot of blowing and then sucking,
and then next thing you know your house is gone!
2 Kommentare, 209 Angesehen,
3 Stimmen
,1.47 Gesamtpunktzahl
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the caring wife 2.6.2008
When the man first noticed that his penis was growing longer,
he was delighted. But several weeks and several inches later,
he became concerned and went to see a urologist. While his wife waited outside,
the physician examined him and explained that, thought rare his condition
could be corrected by minor surgery. The patient's wife anxiously
rushed up to the doctor after the examination and was ...
1 Kommentare, 224 Angesehen,
5 Stimmen
,3.14 Gesamtpunktzahl
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just like marriage 2.6.2008
A man and a woman who have never met before find themselves
in the same sleeping carriage of a train. After the initial embarrassment,
they both manage to get to sleep; the woman on the top bunk, the man
on the lower. In the middle of the night the woman leans over and says,
"I'm sorry to bother you but I'm awfully cold and I was wondering
if you could possibly pass me another blanket."
...
1 Kommentare, 188 Angesehen,
6 Stimmen
,3.65 Gesamtpunktzahl
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amazing foods 2.6.2008
Scientists have discovered a food that diminishes a woman's
sex drive by 90 percent.
Wedding cake!
1 Kommentare, 28 Angesehen,
0 Stimmen
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his last request..... 2.6.2008
Father O'Grady was saying his goodbyes to the parishioners
after his Sunday morning service as he always does when
Mary Clancey came up to him in tears. "What's bothering you so, dear?" inquired
Farther O'Grady. "Oh, father, I've got terrible news."
Replied Mary. "Well what is it, Mary?" "Well, my husband, passed away last night, Father."
"Oh, Mary" said the father, "that's
terrible. Tell me ...
1 Kommentare, 54 Angesehen,
1 Stimmen
,2.40 Gesamtpunktzahl
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